Thursday, December 16, 2010

Are you having another?

JJ is 9 months old and the third girl in our brood. It is amazing how often I am now being asked if we are going to have another baby. I dont know if it is because there is no male heir to carry on the family surname (not that it is uncommon) that makes people think that we will keep going until a boy is born or if it is that more people are having more than 2/3 children or if it is mainly people with no children asking me if I will be producing a football/netball team.

Growing up I had in my head that I would have 2 or 3 children. For many a Christmas I asked my mother for another sibling. This is not because I thought I had been ripped off in the sibling department and wanted a replacement but a compliment to my brother as I thought he was pretty cool and wanted another one. Although it probably did co-incide with when he wouldn't let me put him in dresses anymore!

There have been a few brief seconds when I look at the gorgeous smiling face of JJ and think it would be nice to do it again, but they are very brief and I am enjoying knowing that this is my last time. I don't think I have the physical or mental energy for more children. I want to be able to spend time with each of them, be able to listen to their woes, not worry about finances, take them on adventures, let them try different activities and not feel stretched in a million directions. For me that means stopping at three.

I know there are mothers out there who can and do manage with more and those who set there limit at one or two and others who had that decision taken from them for numerous reasons. So I am grateful for what I have.

How many children do you have? Are you having another or two or three.....? How did you come to that decision? Did you change your mind later?


  1. I'd love to have 4, but my husband has only agreed to 3 so far and even then - not whole-heartedly. I wrote about it here not so long ago

  2. I am done. Four and out. It would have been three and out but we got a bonus! I think you know when it is over. No need to wait for the fat lady to sing :)

  3. Number three and I was done as done. You just 'know', don't you think?

  4. I found you through Maxabella. Lovely blog. This topic touches me! I am the Mum to 3 boys - 4, 2 and 9 months. Like you, I constantly get asked if I will go for number 4 to have a girl! It offends me beyond belief. I am grateful everyday that I have been blessed with 3 happy, healthy and delightful little men. 3 is enough for me though!!!

  5. I have 4 living children, but had 5 pregnancies as my second baby was stillborn. My youngest is 19 months now, and I know she's the last. I tried to tell myself that 3 was enough, but I knew in my heart I needed another. But with 4 it is hard to keep up with all of them. And financially it's scary. But everyone's arrived at the party and that feels terrific.
    Sometimes I think people ask about and comment on the number of kids you have simply because they don't have anything more interesting to say!

  6. I think 3 is it for me. I have two and just had a scan for bambino 3. I can't imagine 4 but i knew before no.2 that it wasn't my last pregnancy...well i hope 3 is enough anyway. Will be happy to finally get rid of all the maternity clothes and baby paraphernalia!

  7. i asked my husband just this week did he think we could do 3? i've been having a clean up & wondered what to do with the baby stuff! i know i have an urge for "just one more" i already have 2 boys (3 & 18mth), both surprises when they came out but for no3 i think i would ask the sex, dont think i'd tell all those people who say "ah yes are you trying for a girl?" i dont care what they are, just a baby........maybe next year :)